Blue week.

Yes, I'm freaking emo this week. The only way i can cheer up myself is laugh loudly, scream, chat or shout. I got no energies to scold, to get angry or whatever. I just want myself to be happy and always having a positive thinking mind. 'Nevermind, i can get through this.' , 'Nevermind, maybe he's just joking.' , 'Nevermind, i don't mean alot to him.' , ‘Nevermind, i got no rights to ask him everything.' How many times i have to repeat these few sentences to myself so that i can feel better? Everything stuck at my bottle-neck, academics? future? Frankly speaking, i treat everyone as in Family, friends, or relationships in the first place. I don't treat you guys as my foe, or even my toe. Sometimes when i let go my tears, that means i want myself to be more comfortable. I dont hide in the pillow and cry like mad EVERY night like what i did when i was really a little girl. Im 17 now, i guess i have to be more understanding. I wish i can.

Nowadays i saw some of them posted a quotes. It's meaningful. 'If a girl care about you, that means she loves you. She don't know what she stays for, but she knows there is something she couldn't let go.' (why so true lol). I got no idea what i want but i don't think the situation right now won't be like 'dreams come true'. Wake up! stupid.

For some bastards who always say me putting myself in an incorrect mood, let me ask you a question. Can you control your tears if something meant to you alot leaves you or something you love disappear? Human beings have their own emotions, their own temper, and even their own limits. Can you just shut your mouth up before making me worse or I tell everyone your names? Please.

Annual General Meeting 2012

Yes, it finally came. 30th of June 2012, form five AJKs retirement day. When i think back, time really passes very very fast. and few months later, it will be our final government test in sec school life. Have to thanks shyuan to bring me to join PRS. Anger, tears, smiles, laughter, fights, arguements, foul words. Everything appeared. Form 2 (2009), when i first stepped in the room i was like 'OMFG why i have to climb up so high just for two hours duty?! kill me please.' That year, i don't even know who are them; that year, i don't think they will be my friends. When projects and courses, we used to sit with gangs. one gang.. two gangs.. three gangs.. four gangs i think? I remember there is actually two boys in PRS i think? We went through tonnes of courses, projects, meetings, and ends up we knew each other.

Form 3 (2010), I thought everybody will be busy preparing their own exams (PMR), then our friendship was sinking like a submarine. but actually we tried to know each other better and better. That year, we changed our uniform into purple, striking purple. In the mean time, we started to feel helping teachers is our responsibility. It's a miracle for me to stay in this club for a year (because i used to be inactive for half year). I insisted to stay in this club, to learn everything i should learn, be more understanding, be more responsible, and be more talkative.

Form 4 (2011), it's our year to continue seniors' responsibility. I was absent when they're having their AGM. That year, i was a Ketua Sumber. I wrote reports for every month, and i get used to it. Special thanks to my assistance Vivian, for counting the hours on the duty book. Form 4, honeymoon year? i dont know. The thing i only remember is 2012 is coming and im going to retire and leave the name tag alone.

Form 5 (2012), yesterday was the Annual General Meeting. Tonnes of weird feelings, watching at the slide shows. Our memories... and i did a slideshow for my slippers. We really grew up, from baby to teenager. for these four years, thanks to the teachers who build up our confidence, our leadership. I learnt alot in these four years. To the new AJKs, please work hard for both sides, PRS and your academic. Wish you guys all the best! :)